So confused...how can I positively change my current situation?

Tell her exactly how you feel. Let her know she's close to losing you and her happy little family life with all of you together. I'm a woman, and I know its very important to stay attractive, and stay fun, and let the kids know that I still have a life as I guide theirs. She needs to know that you married her for the great relationship you had with her and who she has become is hurtful and selfish to neglect your needs & wants with her. She may be betty crocker and a great mom but she needs to really wake up. I think its false advertisment for women to let themselves and their care for their relationships go after they get married. Its unfair to you and I see why you are depressed, no one wants to divorce but no one wants to live in an unhappy union either. So tell her how you feel, put your foot down about it, and give it your best shot to make it work. And if it doesn't, its not your fault you tried and you will be happy again. You and all your kids will be fine. Don't let it wear you out.